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Last update September 2026
“When experiencing frustration, you can let it lead you, or you can take the lead and use it to support what you want to achieve.” — My inner voice
It was a dark, cold Friday evening in February. The small houses surrounding me were illuminated by the soft, moving light of television screens and ceiling lamps.
It was 8:30 p.m., and the London cold was beginning to penetrate my bones. I had lost feeling in my hands and feet some time ago, and I was looking forward to finding somewhere warm to rest.
My friend Raphael and I had been walking at a fast pace since our shift began at 3:30 p.m. That evening, it was just the two of us trying to make a difference by raising funds for people affected by cancer through Macmillan Cancer Support.
After five hours of hard work, we had secured only one sign-up. The end of our shift was approaching, the temperature was dropping and dozens of people had either declined to answer their doors or did not want to hear what we had to say.
As I stood outside a house on Palmer Street, I caught myself thinking:
“Why am I doing this?”
“Who made me take a job as a door-to-door fundraiser?”
“Why can’t I find a job in a warm office?”
The thoughts were running wildly through my mind. I felt increasingly discouraged, and the more frustrated I became, the more personally I took every rejection and every door that closed in front of me.
At that moment, I decided to hold a small team-leadership session inside my own head.
The conversation between frustration and motivation
To make the conversation easier to follow, I will call my frustrated self “F” and my motivational self “M”.
M began by saying:
“I know you feel frustrated. You are not getting the result you expected, and it is difficult to keep walking with the same energy after five hours in the cold. I am sorry that you are experiencing such a challenging moment.”
F replied:
“Thank you. I really need a break. I cannot continue working like this. I feel too frustrated.”
M responded:
“I agree. Stop for a moment and have a drink of water. You may feel better once you have taken a short break.”
So I stopped and took a long drink from the thermos I was carrying in my bag.
That simple pause mattered. Instead of fighting my frustration or pretending it did not exist, I acknowledged how I felt and gave myself a moment to recover.
M then continued:
“Difficulties can give you opportunities to grow. Challenging yourself can help you develop the skills and resilience you will need when you face other problems in the future.”
Deep down, I knew this. However, the cold, tiredness and disappointing results had pushed that knowledge into a distant corner of my mind.
M continued:
“You will experience frustration whenever reality does not match what you hoped would happen. Frustration is a normal human emotion. You cannot always prevent it, but you can choose how you respond to it.”
“When you feel frustrated, you can allow the feeling to control your next decision, or you can understand it and direct your attention towards the next useful action.”
Another voice suddenly appeared in my mind and said:
“Wow. What a great motivator!”
This new voice, which I will call “G”, made me smile.
That small moment of humour helped M take control of my mindset. I returned to each door with renewed energy and handled every response as positively as I could.
One final door
At five minutes to nine, there was time to visit one final house before the shift ended.
A friendly woman from Hungary opened the door and greeted me with a warm smile. We began talking and laughing about food, holidays, Hungary and Italy.
She decided to sign up, allowing me to raise more money for Macmillan Cancer Support. Her support also helped me achieve my best personal and team result since becoming a team leader at Home Fundraising.
I continued believing that something could change until the final minute and the final door. More importantly, I kept my motivation high enough to give that last conversation my full attention.
The positive outcome did not erase the difficulties of the evening. However, it reminded me that frustration does not have to decide how the rest of the day will unfold.
What frustration can teach business owners
Entrepreneurs and business leaders regularly face rejection, delays, unsuccessful campaigns, difficult clients and plans that do not produce the expected results.
Maintaining business confidence does not mean pretending that these experiences are easy. It means recognising your emotional response without allowing it to control every decision you make.
When frustration builds, try the following:
Pause before reacting
Take a short break before sending an angry email, abandoning a project or making an important decision. A few quiet minutes can help you respond more clearly.
Name the problem
Identify what is actually frustrating you. Is it the result, the workload, a lack of information or something outside your control?
Separate facts from assumptions
A disappointing result does not automatically mean that you have failed or that your entire strategy is wrong. You may simply need more information, a different approach or more time.
Be careful not to spend too much energy trying too hard to get everything right.
Focus on the next useful action
Ask what you can realistically do next. The answer could be making one more call, requesting feedback, changing your message, taking a break or returning to the problem tomorrow.
Review the experience
Once the immediate emotion has passed, consider what the experience taught you. Frustration can reveal unclear expectations, weak systems, unrealistic targets or areas where additional support is needed.
I won an important internal battle that evening. I did not control how many people opened their doors or how they responded, but I changed how I approached the final part of my shift.
Experiences like this remind me how much I have developed, how much I have changed and how much I still have to learn.
Your turn
Think about a challenging situation you experienced recently and consider these questions:
- What were you saying to yourself?
- Which parts of the situation were within your control?
- What could you say to yourself instead?
- What useful action could you take next?
- How would you like to respond if a similar situation happens again?
Frustration may be unavoidable, but it does not have to lead. You can acknowledge it, learn from it and choose your next step.
You may also like: Marketing, Motivation And Mindset: Three ‘Ms’ Every Business Needs To Work On And How To Achieve Them Effectively
About the Author
Simone Vincenzi is the founder of Your Power to Shine Ltd. and the co-founder of GTeX Trainings. Simone is an entrepreneur, working as Inner Confidence Coach, Youth Confidence Coach, International Public Speaker and Author. He supports Young Coaches and Entrepreneurs or people that want to make a difference in the world, connecting with their Life Purpose and the Confidence within themselves, so they can create a successful business and a fulfilled life in alignment with their unique message. Simone has been featured as a speaker in some of the major London Speaking clubs like the YES Group London, The Teacher Toolkit, GTeX, Pony Express and The Raw Fest. Simone supports also the major Youth Organisations, like The Future Foundations, all over the country as a Youth Confidence Coach.
https://gtex.org.uk/simone-vincenzi/
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